Friday, November 2, 2007

The equation to a happy family...=)


Hey ya folks!! =P, it's ur good ole friendly shitspittin guy-dude writing about his daily encounters in his shit-filled life. Now, I can't guarantee the authenticity of the materials that you're about to read, but they all have the ecsense of truth planted deep in them, really DEEP.


so, anyway, i wont start writing shits like how happy I am in starting this blog or my hopes n dreams for this blog...i mean, common guys!! this is just a freakin blog...


"Who would have ever expected me winning a marathon? This is my first time and i had my doubts at first. My friends laughed at me but, haha!, who's laughing now bitch ass??! I'm just inches away from the finish line and oh, where are you guys?? hmm, i see, BEHIND me eh? =PP. hehe, victory is in my hands...I can taste the.. "O...O...O..O" I felt the ground trembling n chants of the word/letter "O". suddenly, a GREAT gush of wind passed me. WHOOOSSSSSHHH.. and suddenly there were cheers in front. I saw the line broken. holyfuckingchickenshit!! Someone or something has finished the marathon...Fucking hell! when?...how?? one minute, i was moments away from the finish line and before I knew it, THIS happened???? clearly no one was behind me, i looked 3 times...=.=


I finished the marathon. i scanned the surrounding, looking for the champion. I want to ask for a few pointers from him, cuz he's fast, TOO FAST!! but i cant seem to be able to find him. I asked around. "hi do you know where is the champion?" i asked a skinny boy with glasses who gives me a feeling that he's somehow superhyperactive and madcrazyscientist look. lol... "you cant see him." he said. "why? he left already?" "no... leaned closer to me, trying to whisper something into my ears. "yea?" "you cant see him....cuz.....he...is....too...FAASSSTT!! FAST! FAST! FAST!" and ran away giggling and chanting the word "fast" over and over again.


Boy, kids these days, so....erm...unique. then i saw a girl, and after 3 minutes of discussing with myself whether she's sane or not, i decided to give it a shot. I tapped her on the shoulders. she turned. please don't be crazy..please dont be crazy..please dont be crazy. Immediately, her face turned red...O god, please dont be crazy!! "erm, hi miss, sorry to bother you but.." "do you hate me?" i was interuppted by this random question. "erm...nope, why should I?" "awww...you do hate me...=((..." shit. another crazy sucker. "Look!! a bird!" and i pointed at the ground. She looked down n stared for a full minute, it was later then did she finally concluded that there is no bird! o.O "you fucking liar!! there is no bird~!!!" and burst into tears.


Then i saw another guy, at least i think it's a guy. he looks like a life-size humongous teddy bear but at the same time, i think he's a normal human being just like me and you...hmmm? Luckily, he is NORMAL! ^.^. He pointed me to the champion. "he's rite over there." "where?" and he's gone...wow, he sure can move around pretty fast for a man who looks like the biggest teddy alive..


Up ahead, i saw the back image of a man, wearing a tracksuit with the colours of our National flag, 'Jalur Gemilang'..erm...purple, pink and green??? FINE! i dont know okay!! he must have been in the marathon i guess. He had the word

"S.WONG, D'Champ"

imprinted on his back. His hands are on his waist and I think i could hear him singing Jay Chou's song. If you think Jay Chou can sing, then you are right cuz this fucking FAT dude cant fucking sing for his fat life. oh, did i mention that he's fat? he's is FAT. Capital "F", "A" and "T".


He stopped...why did he stop?? he reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. He pressed a few numbers and i could see signs of frustration...wat seems to be the problem?? hmm...oh, i see, his fingers are too big for the number pad..WOW..he took out his chopstick n 'cucuk' the numbers. "Hello a?" " When can i get my Hydroxcycut Hardcore a??" moments later, "then why u didnt call me yesterday leh????!!! >.<>


Then he went to the benches and sat down, with one of his legs leaning on the rubbish bins. WHAMMM. he flatten it without even trying! his legs must be too overly...fa...muscular. he took out his phone again, n then the chopsticks. who is he gna call again?? The MMC to complain about the stupid fucking rubbish bins?


"hello...ma??" he's calling his mom. suddenly,.....

"MA! NI KAN NI!!" he's mad again??

"WO MEI YO NA GE HYDROXYCUT HARDCORE LIAO A! DIAOOOO..." and the rest...well, think of the Niagra falls, the world's BIGGEST WATERFALL, but instead of water falling, replace it with all the swear and foul words that you know off.


Ladies and gentlemen,


Therefore in conclusion, 'GREAT' son+ 'LUCKY' mum = HAPPY family! =)